Humor in the workplace

I can't wait to do this at work ...

200,000 and counting

Well... It looks like old Betsy has finally made it to the 200,000+ mile club. I feel like she deserves a trophy or something. Maybe a new set of tires even. -nah.
Although she still gets me from point a to point b she is clearly starting to show her age. We actually have a lot in common in our old age. For example... She doesn't start without a lil gas in her. Similar to me needing coffee before I move in the mornings.
I'm sure she won't last me another 200 tho but for now we will just keep on truckin.

Alive and kick in'

For those of you who may be wondering if I'm alive or not - I am. Unfortunately my computer is reacting similarly to if it got ran over by a large bus full of screaming children. Fortunately I got a fancy new phone and a new app which will hopefully make posting a little easier... Time will tell.

cool. calm. collected.

Lately I must say I have somewhat been resembling Ms. Frizzle (aka Ms Frazzled). As my childhood hero at age five I think it was much more acceptable then twenty years later. Then again... who said being a quarter of a century old was supposed to be calm and collected? No Thanks. Sounds a bit boring if I do say so myself.

Instead I will embrace the hustle and bustle of my every day life. After all., your only young once.

Greetings

This morning Ol' Betsy decided to greet me with a 90% flat front passenger tire.
No surprises when they pulled a nice long nail out.

Figures.

  .

The Grudge vs. Holding a Grudge

I can recall sitting in that large pine to the west of my childhood home when I was about ten years old. I was an avid tree climber and my sister and I were enjoying a cup of imaginary tea at the tiptop of this tree which still stands tall. My mother stood at the base and hollered for us to come down, as she often did. I told her to hold on while I had just one more cup of tea. As I reached back for the "kettle" I fell - down, down down. Spinning around each branch and finally landing at the feet of my Mother.

Without a scratch, bump, or bruise I walked off.

15 years later I'm not certain if the fall is to blame, but I have clearly developed some lapse in my memory.  Perhaps this may not be such a bad thing. . . 

Dear Jesse White

Dear Jesse White,

I have somewhat diligently followed your rules of the road safety instructions.

I may have had the occasional rolling stop.

It is plausible that I sent a  "quick" text message which prevented me from keeping my hands in the "10-2" position.

I might have used my cell phone in a work or school zone, but it fit my definition of an emergency.

And my backup light is possibly burnt out.

Ok. . . So maybe I'm not the best driver in the 4-country area, but did I really deserve to get rear ended yesterday? I mean after all I was just sitting at a stoplight minding my own business.

Just add it to the list of injuries for ol' betsy. As for this body? I'll just walk it off.

After she (thank you for giving girls a bad driving rep) struck my bumper we pulled over in the nearest parking lot. She was in tears and sobbing hysterically. I felt sorry for her (that's the social worker in me) so I told her not to worry about it. Nothing major and I didn't have time to wait around for a police report. . . Not my most responsible move, but lets face it, I only had 329 days until the end of the world (or so the Mayans think) and I really didn't want to waste it on a police report.

So we went our separate ways, which was actually the same way since we were on a 1-way street. The interesting part of the story is that I was actually on my way to the police department for work. So I can only imagine her thoughts when she saw me turn my blinker on and ease into the police parking lot. Karma.

A.M.P.U.T Double E

As many of you may have come to realize by now I have trouble sleeping. Lately I have been making it a habit (like clockwork actually) to wake up at 3:30am.I am up, alert, and ready for something thrilling to happen.

Thus far, there hasn't been too much action at 3:30am. Until today that is. Today I decided to be productive. This including registering for summer graduate classes as well as  planning out my fall semester.  I mean, after all, it was only 11:30pm in Hawaii and people were probably still partying. Figured registering for classes was the least I could do.

However, after a short time, I became bored with this task (as I often do) and decided to instead engage in one of my more passionate past-times - wandering aimlessly around the Internet at the click of a single button. Well today I came across something rather inspiring that I would like to share.

This is a photo of Josh Sundquist. He was just nine years old when his left leg was amputated due to bone cancer. He took up skiing at age 13, and was a member of the 2006 U.S. Paralympic Ski Team. Josh is also the founder of a social networking site for amputees, LessThanFour. And he wrote a best selling book called  Just Don’t Fall: How I Grew Up, Conquered Illness, and Made it Down the Mountain.

Many of you who are less sheltered then I may have already been aware of this but that’s not all. Did you know that Sundquist is a rapper, a dancer, and a wit? I am very thankful that I cannot relate to this on a more direct level, however, I thought it was pretty inspiring. Plus, I thought the rap was pretty catchy. How awesome to have such amazing accomplishments AND a sense of humor at the same time!

 The Amputee Rap.

smoking kills? who woulda thought. . .

Growing up we never had comcast or dish network. We got the news channels of 4, 6, and 8. We also had fox 18 which had Saturday morning cartoons. And lastly we were able to get reception for channel 35, which was the religious channel.

Although I don't now, nor would I have called myself an avid TV watcher as a child I do vividly remember seeing several anti-smoking commercials. I'm not sure who sponsored them and I don't think they had any effect on my choice to smoke or not. What I can recall though is the teenage boy turning into a giant fish head while standing at his locker in attempts to pick up a hot chick and light one up. I attempted to find this clip on you tube, but no such luck.

Although I couldn't find the ad I was looking for.... I definitely stumbled across some very "interesting" anti-smoking ads, which I felt the urge to share. . . No I'm not lecturing you on smoking.

The reason that smoking is on my mind is because it has taken me about 2 weeks to fully unpack from my trip to Mexico. While doing so, I found a "stash" of cigarettes that I "found" (aka stole off a table). No, I did not have the intention of smoking them, but I found the packing oh so interesting. Check it out. . .



I'm fairly confident that cigarettes in the U.S do not state this information so bluntly, which is why it caught my eye.. but either way in case you were wondering

SMOKING KILLS

Thank you captain obvious.

7 Lies About HomeSchoolers

I can't begin to count all the times that I've been questioned about being homeschooled. Most of the questions are pretty common, although rather humerous since they are so offkey. Did I have any friends? Did I get to start whenever I wanted? Did you get grades? Are your parents religious freaks?

Thanks to Andrea Summers for sharing this video with me which debunks the 7 lies about homeschoolers.  Enjoy.

Ways To Kill A Bug

I've tried each and every one of these. Plus some.


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The Year Of The Hare? I Think Not.

According to the Chinese calendar, I was born during the year of the Tiger, specifically the fire tiger. Some of the characteristics associated with this sign include:

"Bravery, competitiveness and unpredictability. Tigers love to be challenged and will accept any challenge if it means protecting a loved one or protecting their honor. They don’t worry about the outcome because they know they’ll always land on their feet. Don’t let their calm appearance fool you though; Tigers will pounce when they feel it’s necessary."

"Born to lead, Tigers can be stubborn if they realize they’re not in charge. They have a slight tendency to be selfish but overall, Tigers are extremely generous. They’re very intelligent and they’re always on alert. Tigers are very charming and are well-liked by others. They are not motivated by money or power."

Career: "Tigers have a continual need to be challenged which may explain why they jump from job to job. This isn’t necessarily a problem because they’re smart and able to quickly master new subjects. The best jobs for Tigers are those that will lead them towards positions of leadership"

Relationships: "Creative in their passion, Tigers will never bore their partners. They’re expressive, polite and trustworthy, but watch out. Tigers tend to dominate their relationships. This tendency is instinctive and when monitored closely, such behavior can be kept under control. Partners need to be equally active to keep up with the Tiger’s sense of adventure.".

Some of these characteristics are spot on. Others. . . I  prefer not to clam as qualities of myself. However, stubborn - Very. Optimistic - Absolutely. Overly dominating in relationships yet passionate? That's debatable, but highly likely.

Regardless of being born in the year of the tiger I have decided to NOT follow the Chinese Calendar this year and make up my own. I am disregarding the year of the Hare (2012) and dedicating this year to me, myself, and I. Could this idea possibly go back to Tigers being a little selfish? . . . Just some food for thought.

The idea isn't as selfish as it sounds, but more of an opportunity to do some things that I have been putting off for "tomorrow". So, in honor of taking the year to celebrate ME I did something I had never done before yet was on my bucket list.

Today I went to the movie theater and saw a movie. . . Alone.  At first I was feeling slightly silly, but after the initial purchase of my movie ticket I started to realize some of the benefits.

First of all, I rarely do anything alone so that was an accomplishment in itself.

Secondly, It was nice being able to sit wherever I wanted and not feeling like anybody was judging me for eating the entire container of popcorn by myself.

And the best thing of all. . . I got to watch the movie that I wanted without having to rock, paper, scissors for it.

So, maybe I am selfish or maybe I am just taking some time to do things that I have been putting off. Either way, I welcome you 2012 with arms wide open. Bring it!


I will leave the rest to Marilyn Monroe who says it best:

“I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.”

International Thank You Day!

International Thank You Day - January 11th, 2012.

Yes,  I am well aware that I am 3 days late, but I don't think it has to be international thank you day for me to give a couple of shout outs to some people that really brightened my day.

I'm beginning to believe that I have a stamp on my forehead that reads "I NEED HELP" or perhaps it is that helpless puppy dog look that I have been roaming around with. OR more optimistically, maybe human beings are actually nice? . . .. Nah. Doubt it.

So where do these thank yous belong you ask? It all started back on Tuesday when Ol' Betsy decided to make a very awful screeching noise as I came to a halt at a stop sign. Luckily, my dad has trained me very carefully to notice the sounds of break pads in need of replacement as I have ruined several sets of roters on Ol' Betsy for this very reason. So what did I do next? Call my mechanic of course. Unfortunately, he was booked for a week and couldn't get me in for a week - Unacceptable.

So I let go of my pride and decided to check with Midas, who agreed to do it that very hour. . . Well, 3 hours and $186.20 later, my break pads were like new. My tires, however, according to "Dan" were illegal to be driving on. Ugh. He asked if he should change them for me... No thanks, I'll do it "later". Of course we all know what later means.... When one of them blows up.

Well, A couple of days and a few inches of snow later sure showed me. Thursday night I got stuck going up a hill and felt myself slowly sliding backwards. Luckily the car behind me got away without a scratch, but this sure got me dreaming of a new set of tires for Ol' Betsy.

The following day as I attempted to leave work, I realized I wasn't going anywhere. Yes, I somehow managed to get stuck in a parking lot. Not on a hill. Not in a ditch. Not even in a snow covered driveway. We are talking about a freshly plowed, barely even slick, parking lot. This is where my shout out is due.....

THANK YOU TO THE MAN WHO WAS DRESSED TO IMPRESS WHO PUSHED ME OUT OF THE PARKING LOT!!!!

Yes, he was wearing dress pants and jacket and still, without even being asked, just got down and dirty and helped me out. I wish I would of asked his name, but I was so caught off guard by his kindness I didn't think to ask.

So. . . Needless to say, today I ventured into Walmart to buy a new set for Ol' Betsy. I about swallowed my tongue when "Mike" told me it would be $360. Ugh. As I hesitantly agreed to pay the price I ventured through Walmart finding random odds and ends to spend what little money I had left.

30 minutes later, I heard my name being paged across the intercom to come back to Tire Lube Express. As I dragged my feet down the isles, Mike approached me telling me that I was nuts to change all 4 tires and should only get 2. He used some language I wasn't familiar with and said he was only going to put on 2. Fantastic! So.... Shout out time.

THANK YOU MIKE FROM WALMART FOR TELLING ME I DIDN'T NEED NEW TIRES AND SAVING ME $120.

Mike could have just changed them as I, a girl knowing nothing about cars, had asked and it would have been all the same, but he was kind enough to help me out and offer a bit of advice.

After about 30 minutes more, I heard my named paged yet again. This time, Mike offered to buy Ol' Betsy from me. Our conversation went something like this. . . .

Mike: How much do you want for your car?

Me: I don't know. I haven't thought about it.

Mike: I'll buy it off you.

Me: I'd have to ask my Dad. (yes I still ask my dad all my car questions).

Me: Are you looking for a new/old car?

Mike: Yes, for the demo derby.

Me: Your saying you want to DESTROY Ol' Betsy? NO WAY!

Once again my heart sank. For a short instance I thought he actually LIKED my car. Little did I know, he wanted to tare Ol' Betsy to pieces. I slowly began to shake my head and informed him that she wasn't for sale anymore.
Ol' Betsy and I are like pea's in a pod. How dare somebody think I would part with her on such terms (as tempting as it may be).... Regardless of the slight insult..... Thanks Again to these kind people!

Voicemail? What's that?

Ring Ring Ring

Me: Hey Mom, I saw you called.
Mom: I just left you a voicemail.
Me: Whats the plan for tomorrow?
Mom: I just left you a voicemail.
Me: I know, I just decided to call you back instead.

Is it just me or do you just cut to the chase and return the call too? Personally, I would rather hear the news straight from the horses mouth than listen to a voicemail and be left with questions roaming around in this head of mine. I mean, lets face it, there isn't enough room and memory in this fine brain of mine to keep things just rolling around up there.

If my phone doesn't show a missed call, chances are. . . your not going to get a call back. Yes, I saw the "30 new voicemails", but I don't check those until my "mailbox is full".

Recommendation of the day when dealing with this beast (aka me): Call twice and if I still don't answer, shoot me a text. The end.

Looking Up

For those of you who have had the luxury of visiting my humble home you will quickly notice what others call my "lack of decor ability". My colors rarely flow and my paintings never match. While some may consider this the absense of interior decorating skills, I have always considered myself a bit of an eclectic. I just purchase or "find" individual pieces that I consider "treasures" and don't bother to worry if it will match the rest. This is what I think makes a house a home. Which is exactly why I am on the prowl to find this outdoor mat to place outide my front door....

I do feel that it would be a nice addition. Please let me know if you happen to spot one at the nearest Good Will or Salvation Army so I can add it to my collection of "treasures".

Bubble Refill Station

How did I never have one of these as a child? . . .
Or as an adult for that matter?

"Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does."
                   -William James

Happy Belated Birthday

Happy Birthday To Me!

Ever since I moved here I have been sleeping on a bed which you can feel the springs poking you right through the mattress. When you roll over in the middle of the night you hear a screech worse then fingers running down a chalkboard which will wake you up instantly.

So. . . . Long overdue I bought myself a new KING sized bed, down comforter, duvet cover, and some accent pillows!

I can lay horizontal OR vertical OR diagonally and not hang off the edges.


Laying in the middle I cannot reach either side.


And I quickly found out that it has much more bounce than my old bed for jumping/dancing with myself.

And best of all, Dustin painted me an amazing piece of artwork to match the coloring perfectly!

Love it.

Doubtful I will EVER get out of bed or get anything done now!

Fotografias en México

More Fotografias en México.

January 1st - January 6th, 2012

SideNote: Sorry for some of the poor quality. Couldn't figure out how to adjust since they were taking on phone.



Getting Comfy Upon Arrival With The "Swan"

The Lounge Bar

Hanging out in the Lounge Bar

Feliz Navidad

Dinner at the Mexican Speciality Restraunt

At the Swing"er" Bar

SteakHouse Dinner

First Thing I Woke Up To

Soaking Up Some Sun!

View from the Balcony

Sitting in My "Boyfriend" Chair waiting for dinner

Yummy Dessert! Chocolate Cake.

Feliz Año Nuevo

If I were to save all my $$ and spend it on one thing and one thing only it would have to be vacationing. Hands Down!  So new and exciting. You never know what your going to stumble across or who your going to meet.

I have been to Mexico 2 times in the past. Read -  2 Gingas + Tequila = Total Terror, Fun In The Sun, and Job Skills Needed. I don't think I could ever get sick of laying by the poolside/ocean, having fruity cocktails with umbrellas brought to me by a pretty senorita, and soaking up the sun day in and day out.

Therefore, as a special New Years treat to myself I decided to take a week long vacation to Playa Del Carmen, Mexico. Probably would not have chosen Mexico as my final destination again; however, It was only about 2 weeks prior to takeoff that I booked the trip so my options and funds were limited.

For my compañero de viaje I managed to track down a strapping young lad (Dustin) to escort me on my journey.

On December 31st, 2011 we embarked to Elk Grove Village where we would stay the night at the Ramada Inn and be transported to O'Hare International airport at 4am the next morning. Needless to say we planned on having dinner and then hitting the sack to get some rest before our long journey.

However, much to our surprise the Ramada was not nearly as cool as it once was. I'm guessing the prime time of this establishment was around 1970 and the individuals who were choosing to ring in the new year here had some very interesting smells drifting from under their doors. I'm fairly certain that everybody else at the hotel had invited Mary Jane to their private parties.

Finally, after 2 flights, 1 layover, and an hour long cab ride we finally made it to The BlueBay Grand Esmeralda in Playa Del Carmen where it was everything I had hoped for and more! The landscaping was amazing and the staff were great.

When we arrived they had delicious cocktails waiting for us and Hector gave us a private tour of the resort which included a a sports bar, gift shops, 2 buffets, 6 speciality restaurants (Mexican, Italian, french, steakhouse, seafood, and Oriental), a swing bar, lounge bar, 2 pools, spa, gym, and much more!

There were these odd little Lemur's crawling all about the resort which I must admit were a little creepy. They really didn't bother you unless you attempted to feed them. They looked something of a mix between a raccoon, rat, and monkey. This was one thing that I had not seen preciously in Mexico. But at this resort they were all over the place.

There was nightly entrainment including a Mexican version of Grease, a Michael Jackson tribute show, and a Mexican Festival dance; however, my favorite part was by far when Dustin got up and did a Michael Jackson dance on stage.

The weather was mediocre as it was fairly cloudy on a few days and averaged about 80 degrees. I, of course would prefer blistering hot, but it was easier on the skin and required much less aloe vera this way.

Weather for Playa del Carmen,  Mexico

79°F | °C

Sun

Mon

Tue

Wed

Mostly Cloudy

Wind: E at 10 mph

Humidity: 65%

76°

66°

77°

66°

79°

66°

81°

61°

During our stay we took a half day snorkling trip at the second largest barrier reef in the world in which I saw a sting ray, baracuda, several small beautiful salt water fish (including a dory fish), and even HELD a sea turtle.

We also took a small excurison down the beach to check out a lagoon where I collected some really cool shells, saw some soft coral, and almost stepped on a huge crab swimming around in the ocean.

Here are some random photos of our stay. . . .



Standing on the Pier



Dustin hanging out on the drift wood



Enjoying lunch with a cerveza and overlooking the ocean



Photo Shoot

One of the many "interesting" decors the maids would leave

Photo Shoot2

Kirate Kid

Middle of the main pool where you can lay out by the fountain

I have some other pictures that I have not yet uploaded, but as soon as I do I will post them!

Unfortunately, now I am home and have to get back to work AND school tomorrow. At least I am feeling refreshed and ready to start the new year! Although in the back of my mind I am wondering. . . Where should I travel to next?