Dangerous Spontaneous Mischievous

An expert is a person who has special skill or knowledge in some particular field. That being said -  "special skill" could be interrupted in an array of different ways. I, for example, believe that there are few topics that I would consider myself an expert in. Some of those areas include the rules of skippo, good hygiene (although I may not always practice), and the positive effects of having large feet (see oh how many feet you meet). Others may argue that I am not an expert in these areas and in fact know very little of these topics. This is debatable.

One area that I do not consider myself an expert in is the DSM (diagnostic and statistical manuel of mental disorders). For those of you who are not in the mental health field, it is basically a compilation of mental health diagnosis that includes symptoms, treatment, prevalence, criteria, etc. To say I am not an expert does not correlate with how well I perform my job, but it is me admitting that I have a lot to learn (although I have come a long way since last December when I was asking "what's the DSM?")

One diagnosis that I'm sure your all familiar with is ADHD - Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Basically, in a nutshell, this is when an individual has a problem with inattentiveness, over-activity, impulsivity, or a combination. I vividly remember being asked on a first date "Do you have ADHD?" Is it that obvious?

I'm assuming the guy that asked me that question was referencing my inability to focus on one topic of conversation, difficulty siting still, and lack of overall concentration. Now a days we have another name for this - "first date jitters". However, at the time I was outraged, shocked, and slightly angry. Now, a decade later, I laugh because this was actually a very insightful question. 

I recently decided that I have "Life ADHD". What is this you ask? Well, it is my most recent diagnosis for myself. My most recent ailment. Watch out authors of the DSM (whoever you are), because I'm rewriting you and if you turned to the index you would find Life ADHD on page 304 and it would look something like this:

Life ADHD

• Symptoms
• Inability to stay in one location for a significant period of time
• Becomes easily bored and uninterested with career choice
• Jumping from one interest/hobby to another
• Frequent changes in relationships/friendships
• Impulsively making life changing decisions
• Treatment:
• Do what makes you happy because "It sounded like a good idea at the time"
• Prevalence:
• Predominantly found in girls named Emily and possibly rare breeds called Laura

Okay, so maybe this wouldn't fit so well on page 304. Perhaps I would rename my DSM as Dangerous Spontaneous Mischievous. Or even title my book as "Emily Needs To Grow Up". - Nah, that would be too boring.

I like being chocolate swirl with sprinkles.  What fun is vanilla?